Yes, I know. This record shows nothing new, it discovers nothing, well known tricks & riffs, etc. I’m not fucking virtuoso – I know it as well. So what a fuck I’ve recorded it for? To show you it’s worth getting up from your knees, to pick up the pieces and to LIVE! I’ve been destroying everything in my live during several years – everything what used to give the sense to my live. I’m not saying about the music only, as I used to listen to the music a lot – but generally about myself as a whole (family, friends, hobbies…) Work, vodka, work, vodka… Dreams went fucking away.
The only ones which left were: to have something to drink, eventually somebody to fuck. Hopelessness. The world started slowly (and then faster and faster) falling to pieces. The live wasn’t colorful any more… I decided to turn everything upside down one day – only because I wanted to start to live again. I didn’t even dream a few years ago that I’d record a CD. There were a few guitars and some other gear in my house, but they were only systematically… dusted off – of course if I was able to get up from the bed after a few weeks binge.
I started to get used to use the guitar again around the end of 2009, since when I came to UK after my rehab. It wasn’t easy, and it still isn’t This CD is not only the accomplishment of my youthful dreams, but also it’s a warm thanksgiving to all, who helped me to get up and to pick up the pieces. Yes, I know this CD is disjunctive – it was the idea. If there are some another recordings in a future, they will have the same defects. It’s really difficult to have over 40 years of “coherent” life.
I mean it could be possible if somebody worked all those years in one place on the production line, performing mechanically the same activity. My live wasn’t like that and I hope it will never be. Each track is a kind of a story – the piece of my live. If you don’t like it – you have that right (read above). If just a few people will like it, it means it was worth to do it. Everything was played/recorded/issued for my private money, so it took nearly 3 years from the idea to the final product, but…
I DID IT!